Your mind comes first and body follows after. If ones mind is in a bad state the body will deteriorate. I have neglected both of them over the years mistreating & abusing them mentally and physically. I feel like I have hit the rock bottom again. As a working mother I try to tackle multiple tasks at the same time. I work long hours and my job is of a physical nature. When I come home, spend time with my baby girl, put her to bed I face housework, dinner preparation, mandatory self- care and I just feel so exausted. A cheeky drink seems to relieve exaustion by giving me a false sense of having more strength than I really posses. It also seems to erase anxious thoughts and worries but it’s a short term solution. Does it really help? No !!! There is nothing wrong with a drink or two but for pleasure but not as energy drink. I need to focus on myself more and stop trying tick every single thing off my ‘to do’ list. I feel tired and exausted. The only people who keep me going are my partner and my daughter. I have become very negative. It will hopefully change.
I intend to plan meals in advance, make time to relax in the evening, be more positive by living in the moment without continuous overthinking.
I want to embrace my body and donate clothes that no longer fit me to a charity shop. My life has changed, my body has changed ! Currently, I’m in the new chapter of life. I haven’t lost my identity but I feel like I’m clinging to the past life constantly forgetting that I’m a mum now and have my own family. Donating clothes seem to me like a good start.
Love & peace to you all !!!
Categories: Diary of a 1st Time Anxious Mum